


He Holds Me In His Big Arms

by ispun



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-18
Updated: 2013-09-18
Packaged: 2017-12-26 22:33:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/971067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ispun/pseuds/ispun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this one is for my seikki crew on tumblr. ngggggg.</p><p>disclaimer: none of this happened. <br/>rating: black flag</p><p>i always welcome constructive criticism, kind comments and gentle nagging to write more. if you find any errors, whether they are language-based, factual or formatting, please do let me know.</p></blockquote>





	He Holds Me In His Big Arms

“You won!” says Heikki, striding towards Seb. Seb turns to him, smiling, feels the rush of pleasure he always feels at seeing his trainer. He wants to hug him, but he’s had enough of the engineers teasing him about their relationship. Yeah, Heikki’s attractive, he’s not blind; and yeah, he’s strong and he gives great hugs and they have a close relationship. But that’s normal; Heikki’s his physio and they spend a lot of time together. So Seb just sips from his water bottle and follows Kimi out to receive his prize.

On the podium, Kimi puts his arm around Seb, squeezes him close as the crowds cheer. Seb feels his eyes drawn to Heikki and...it’s weird because Heikki kind of purses his lips for a moment like he’s annoyed before he plasters a smile back onto his face and cheers Seb along with everyone else. And Seb feels...guilty? That’s weird. He brushes it off. It’s easy to brush off weird emotions like that when you’re standing on the top step of the podium, a fourth title in your sights.

\--

It’s later in the motorhome and Heikki’s working on Seb’s back. Every knot, every kink is gone over with fanatical precision. And of course, Seb’s had a lot of massages in his time, from a lot of people. But no-one like Heikki. It’s one of the main reasons he hired him. His hands are practically the size of Seb’s waist, but best of all, they’re so strong. When Heikki touches him, it’s like he’s reaching beyond Seb’s muscles, soothing pains that Seb didn’t even know were there.

Heikki pushes the flat of his hand deep into the muscle just under Seb’s shoulder blade, making Seb groan, half in pleasure, half in pain. It’s tense there, maybe a bit damaged from flinging the car around too hard. Heikki keeps pushing at it putting as much weight on it as possible. He doesn’t ask Seb if it hurts though. It’s strange, Seb thinks. He’s not talking at all. Normally when Seb makes a noise, Heikki checks that nothing is hurting too much.

“Is everything...?” Seb starts.

“Shh,” replies Heikki. “Let me work.”

Seb is surprised. There’s no anger in Heikki’s voice, but it’s not like him to be so short with him. They’ve long since given up any pretence of Seb being Heikki’s boss, but still, Heikki normally lets Seb set the tone with this kind of thing. If Seb wants to talk after the race, Heikki lets him talk. If he just wants peace and quiet, well, Heikki can do that to perfection.

When he’s finished on Seb’s back, Heikki moves the towel to one side and puts his hands on Seb’s ass. Seb’s never really been comfortable with this, however necessary it is after sitting in a Formula 1 car for two hours. It’s weird, because he never felt like that with Tommi, and it’s nothing that Heikki does or doesn’t do. He’s always totally professional, there’s just something about the way he digs his fingers into the tense muscles of Seb’s ass that makes Seb get...well, get hard. More than once he’s had to pretend he’s asleep so that he can hide the fact that he’s got an erection, and every time, Heikki’s just covered Seb with a towel and sat reading or watching something on his laptop until Seb pretends to wake up, laughing and shaking his head at his feigned exhaustion. 

And today, it’s one of those days. Heikki pushes his thumb into a place just at the top of Seb’s thigh and leaves it there, pushing down hard and barely moving it, just keeping up a steady pressure. Seb wriggles a little, but Heikki’s other hand comes down on his shoulder, holding him in place. For Seb, there’s always been something so comforting about being controlled like this by his physio. Being totally at someone else’s mercy, being treated almost like an object, a riddle for Heikki to solve. When there’s so much focus on him in the team, when everyone’s hard work comes down to what Seb does or doesn’t do on Sunday, he sometimes feels overwhelmed with responsibility. In Heikki’s hands, he feels safe, like he’s being looked after. Heikki moves his thumb over a little, and that’s when it happens. Seb feels himself growing hard and he shifts around on the table to try to get himself in a more comfortable position and Heikki puts his hand back on Seb’s shoulder and tells him to stop moving.

“Look, I just...I just need to sort myself out, ok?” says Seb, moving his hand down to pull his cock against his stomach.

“What’s wrong? Is something hurting?”

“It’s not that.” Seb’s blushing now and Heikki laughs.

“It’s normal, you know that. I’m going to be done in a second anyway.”

He pushes down hard one final time and pulls the towel back across Seb. Heikki looks at his watch. 

“We should go back to the hotel,” he says. “You need to be up early tomorrow for your flight.”

“Right, well, I can’t exactly stand up right now, Heikki.”

Heikki just laughs and chucks Seb his t-shirt.

“I’ll be outside.”

\--

Back at the hotel, Seb comes to Heikki’s room to watch a movie. He’s still embarrassed about the incident earlier, but, what the hell, it’ll be less awkward if they just face each other now. And what’s more, it’s boring sitting every night in hotel rooms alone. At least now he has Heikki for company. Sometimes he might go and hang out with Kimi or one of the other drivers, or some of the guys from the team instead, but if not, he always has Heikki. And he has an early flight tomorrow, so it’s probably better to just stay here, relax.

They’re just about to start watching something on TV when Seb’s phone beeps.

You want to go for a drink?

It’s Kimi. And you know, thinks Seb, a drink would be good. Just one. It’s been a long day, he’s still fired up with adrenaline from the win and a drink would be perfect right now.

“Hey Heikki, I might go and meet Kimi.”

Heikki looks at him, his face is blank.

“You have an early flight tomorrow. You can’t.”

“I can’t? Are you my mother now?” Seb teases.

“I’m your trainer. You can’t.”

“I’m going for one drink, I’m not running away to Thailand,” Seb laughs. Heikki is so strict with him sometimes. Seb stands up, grabs his keycard. 

“Hey, I’ll see you tomorrow at breakfast, ok?”

Seb takes a step to the door but before he can get far, Heikki’s hand is on his arm, gripping him tight.

“I told you. You have an early flight tomorrow. You can’t go,” Heikki says angrily. His face is like stone.

Seb looks up at him, a bewildered smile on his face.

“Heikki, what are you doing?”

Seb expects Heikki to laugh, to let go of his arm and slap him lightly on the bottom the way he did sometimes. But Heikki grips him tighter and pulls Seb to him. Seb stumbles into Heikki; he might be fit, but Heikki has a good 20 kilos on him. With his other hand, Heikki spanks - not slaps, spanks - Seb hard on his ass.

“You’re...not...going...out...” says Heikki, each harsh word punctuated with a hard smack.

Seb is too shocked to speak. He stands, his mouth open, breathing hard. Heikki puts his hand to Seb’s face, draws it up to his.

“Do you understand?” he says, more gently this time. Still firm, but without the anger.

“I...I just wanted to...meet Kimi, I,” Seb stammers. He looks up at Heikki, at Heikki’s blue eyes boring back into his. Heikki smiles gently back at him and shakes his head.

“You can’t go,” he says, stroking his thumb across Seb’s jawline, his hand still tight on Seb’s wrist. “You have to get up early. It’s for the best.”

Seb’s still looking up at Heikki, who just looks back, his thumb still moving gently on Seb’s jaw. Heikki leans a little towards Seb, who jerks his head away.

“You’re right, I should go to bed. I’m tired, got to get up tomorrow,” he babbles, his mind racing.

He goes to leave, but Heikki keeps hold of him.

“Seb,” Heikki says, softly. “I’m sorry I hit you. But I’m your trainer and I know what’s best for you. You go out with Kimi, you won’t be back until late and you’ll drink too much. You need to think about the rest of the season. You haven’t won the championship yet, you know.”

“I know, I just...I know.” Seb takes a deep breath because what he’s going to say is about to change everything between them.

“Heikki, were you...were you going to kiss me then?”

Heikki cocks his head to one side and smiles at Seb.

“Would you like me to kiss you?”

Seb looks up at Heikki. He thinks of all the times that Heikki has touched him, has hugged him, has made him feel safe. Even now, after Heikki has spoken so harshly to him, there’s something comforting in it. Something safe in Heikki’s big hand tight around his wrist. When they walk through the paddock, he feels shielded from fans and paparazzi by Heikki’s bulk. He thinks of the hugs Heikki gives him after races, especially when there have been bad times, like when everyone booed him at Silverstone. And all the times like this afternoon when he’s felt himself getting hard as Heikki’s pressed into his flesh. A thousand scenarios flash through his mind and he feels like a lost little boy.

“Come,” says Heikki, guiding Seb to the bed. Heikki sits down and pulls Seb into his lap. 

“Look at me,” says Heikki and Seb looks. Heikki reaches up, strokes his fingers through Seb’s hair. 

“It’s ok to want this,” Heikki tells him. “It’s normal. It’s fine.”

Seb closes his eyes, feels Heikki’s hand on his chin. Heikki’s arm is tight around Seb’s waist now, his other hand tilting Seb’s face to his. Their lips touch, tentatively at first, then Heikki’s tongue pushes against Seb’s lips. Seb makes a noise low in his throat, his cock getting harder as Heikki’s kisses become more insistent. Heikki moves down the bed, pulls Seb toward him.  
Their cocks brush against each other and Seb is surprised to feel that Heikki is hard too.

Heikki pulls Seb’s t-shirt off, revealing the lithe body that he’s spent so many hours working on. It’s as much his body as it is Seb’s. The muscles he’s helped develop, the aches he’s rubbed out, the weight he’s trimmed off til Seb hasn’t an ounce of fat. Seb feels Heikki’s eyes on him and the look in them can only be read as pride. He blushes under Heikki’s gaze, closing his eyes and leaning in for another kiss. Heikki moves back, pulls his own t-shirt off. Of course Seb’s seen him without his shirt on - they go to the sauna after running, they go to the shower in the gym - but now, he lets himself stare at Heikki’s body. He’s so big. That’s the only way to describe him. His chest is twice the size of Seb’s, his biceps bulge with muscle. Seb thinks of all the times he’s had that weight pushing down on him, kneading out the pains in his back and shoulders, all the times Heikki’s enveloped him in those big arms.

“Jeans off,” says Heikki, and Seb stumbles to obey him. “And your shorts,” Heikki tells him, smiling, undressing himself and throwing his clothes to one side.

When they’re both naked, Seb falls back into Heikki’s arms. Heikki nuzzles his cheek against Seb’s hair, runs his hands up Seb’s back. 

“Are you ok?” whispers Heikki. Seb just nods, just lets himself enjoy Heikki’s strong arms around him. Heikki kisses the top of Seb’s head, holds his palm up to Seb’s mouth. Seb looks up at him, confused.

“Lick,” instructs Heikki. Seb pushes his tongue out tentatively, licks over Heikki’s palm. Heikki moves his hand down to touch Seb’s cock. Seb breathes in sharply as Heikki begins to jerk him off, slow but hard, his hand surrounding Seb completely. Seb tenses in pleasure, groaning as Heikki increases the pressure. Seb reaches down to touch Heikki, wrapping his hand around his cock. Seb’s not small, but Heikki’s cock feels much bigger, harder even.

“Would you like me to fuck you?” asks Heikki now. Seb opens his eyes, looks up at him. 

“Yes,” he replies. “But I’ve never...I’ve never done that before.”

“I’ll be gentle,” Heikki tells him, kissing him on the nose.

He lets go of Seb, reaches into a drawer beside the bed, grabs some lube he has stashed there.

“You’re going to need to turn over,” he tells Seb as he applies the lube to his fingers. 

Seb moves onto his stomach, gasps as Heikki touches his hole. Heikki rubs it gently, not pushing inside, just turning circles with the pads of his fingers. Seb buries his face into the pillow, overwhelmed by the feeling of giving so much over to Heikki. He’s never been touched in this way by anyone and yes, it feels good, but it also feels wrong, forbidden; dirty somehow. As he gets used to the sensation, Heikki’s fingers stroking him in a gentle rhythm, Seb relaxes into it. His nerves feel as though they’re on fire, every touch eliciting a groan from his throat.

Heikki kisses up Seb’s back, continuing to rub gently over his hole. He kisses Seb’s neck, running his tongue over the warm skin there, before lying down next to him, pulling Seb into his arms, placing his free hand over Seb’s cock, which is dripping with precome.

“This might hurt a bit at first. But just tell me and I’ll stop,” Heikki whispers. “Try not to tense up.”

Heikki begins to push a finger into Seb. Seb winces at the sensation. It’s not exactly unpleasant, but it’s too much almost. He can feel the muscles stretch open, feel the burn inside as Heikki pushes deeper. Heikki squeezes Seb’s cock, reassuring him.

“Are you ok?” he asks, kissing Seb’s cheek.

Seb nods. Heikki has his finger in up to the first knuckle now and he begins to push in and out. At first, it just feels weird to Seb but soon, as he opens up, it feels like nothing he’s felt before. Heikki pushes his finger deeper, before gently adding another. He continues jerking Seb’s cock gently, as he pushes his fingers in and out, stretching Seb as gently as he can.

By the time he has three fingers in Seb, Seb is writhing in Heikki’s arms and Heikki squeezes him tight. 

“Are you ready?” he asks. Seb leans back, kissing Heikki on the lips, his fingers in Heikki’s hair. Heikki pushes his fingers a final time into Seb, who groans and tightens his muscles around Heikki’s fingers.

“Yeah,” Seb whispers. “I’m ready.”

Heikki moves down behind Seb, puts some more lube onto his cock. He pulls Seb’s ass up off the bed and lines his cock up against Seb’s hole. With a gentle push, he begins penetrating him. Seb bites down onto his hand. He’s not sure he’s going to be able to take this, can’t imagine what it will feel like once Heikki is all the way in. Heikki has one hand on Seb’s thigh, stroking it soothingly. He pushes in, inch by inch, until Seb is filled up with his cock. They stay there for a few minutes, Heikki stroking Seb gently as Seb gets used to the stretch. Heikki gives an experimental thrust, and Seb responds, grinding his ass back against Heikki. 

Heikki starts a gentle rhythm, rocking his hips into Seb. He wraps one hand around Seb’s cock, using the other to keep Seb from falling down onto the bed. Seb is panting hard as Heikki’s hand moves over his cock. He feels completely removed from everything; the whole world is reduced to just him and Heikki, Heikki moving in and out of him, closer to him than anyone has ever been.

“Oh fuck, Heikki, I’m going to come,” Seb gasps, and Heikki increases his pace as Seb comes, white spilling over Heikki’s hand. Seb’s ass grips Heikki tighter, pulsing around Heikki’s cock, bringing him to orgasm, spilling his seed deep into Seb. Heikki struggles to stay up, eventually collapsing gently on top of Seb. He pulls his cock out gently, feeling his come dripping out of Seb’s ass. He kisses the back of Seb’s neck, stands up. Seb complains, reaches out to him, but Heikki goes to the bathroom, fetches a cloth and wipes Seb clean.

Seb looks up at him sleepily. 

“Are you ok?” Heikki asks.

Seb just nods, holds his arms out. Heikki pulls the covers back, lifts Seb up and tucks him into the bed before crawling in beside him and wrapping his arms around him. Heikki plants a final kiss on Seb’s cheek.

“You need to sleep,” he tells him. “Your flight is early.”

He switches the light off, and holds Seb until his eyes close and his breathing becomes deep and regular.

**Author's Note:**

> this one is for my seikki crew on tumblr. ngggggg.
> 
> disclaimer: none of this happened.   
> rating: black flag
> 
> i always welcome constructive criticism, kind comments and gentle nagging to write more. if you find any errors, whether they are language-based, factual or formatting, please do let me know.


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